Planning Ahead: What Families Should Know About Pre-Planning a Funeral

When someone dies, it’s the survivors who, in the midst of a difficult time, have to make the funeral arrangements. During those moments of grief, handling the details of a memorial service can add even more onto the plate of those who are trying to deal with the loss.

Pre-planning a funeral not only guarantees that your end-of-life wishes are honored and prepaid for, but it also takes the pressure off loved ones.

“Preplanning isn’t being morbid; it’s one of the kindest, most loving things you can do for the people you’ll leave behind,” says David Perry, advanced planning director at J. Henry Stuhr Funeral Home. “It turns a potentially overwhelming time into one where they can just focus on remembering and honoring you.”

Funeral planning can start through simple steps, like having a short conversation with a trusted funeral director or jotting down notes about how you’d like the service to go.

“When you are preplanning your funeral, you should first decide the type of service you want and then make preparations for the financial aspects,” explains Perry.

In addition to your own wishes, consider what your survivors may need. “Often, people come to me and say, ‘ Hey, just cremate me,’ but they don’t consider that their loved ones need closure,” shares Erin Maser, advanced planning director at Stuhr’s. “It might be a good idea to discuss this with your immediate family.”

Choosing a Service Type

When selecting a type of service, you can choose from burial or cremation, or newer options like a natural burial. A natural or green burial allows the body to be returned to the earth and naturally recycled into new life, usually without the use of embalming fluids, metal caskets, or concrete vaults.

“Other things to think about include what type of casket, if needed, and service you want,” adds Perry. “For example, a traditional funeral, simple memorial, celebration of life, religious elements, or none at all. Then, select any music, readings, special people to involve, and any preferences for things like flowers, attire, or charities for donations instead of flowers.”

Considering the Costs

The expenses of a funeral vary and depend on what’s included in your plans.

“Funeral expenses can add up quickly, and prices tend to rise over time,” says Perry, who advises customers to ask for itemized price lists – your right under Federal Trade Commission (FTC) rules – check reviews, and think about location and services. “You don’t have to prepay everything, but many people choose to lock in today’s prices through a pre-need plan or trust, which can protect against inflation.”

Maser adds that another reason for preplanning is that Stuhr’s guarantees their pricing. “For instance, if you come in today and pay, no matter when you pass, there will be no more monies owed,” she says.

If you do prepay, confirm that your arrangements are transferable if you move and that the funds are protected.

“In South Carolina, we are not allowed to take your money and put it into our bank account,” explains Maser. “It has to go into a funding vehicle – a life insurance policy – just for your end-of-life expenses. That policy is transferable anywhere, so if you move, you can take it with you and set it up with another funeral home.”

If you have purchased a life insurance policy to cover your funeral costs, you can still make all of your arrangements ahead of time, with one caveat. “The only downside to that is that we can’t guarantee the price when using an insurance policy,” says Maser.

Once you have selected the details of your service, Perry suggests writing them down in a simple document or using a funeral home’s pre-planning form.

“Then—most importantly—tell your family or executor about it, share copies, and keep the original in an accessible spot, not just in a safe-deposit box that might be hard to open quickly,” he adds. “This one step prevents family arguments, guesswork, and added stress during grief, and ensures your farewell reflects you instead of default decisions.”

You can start the funeral pre-planning process online with Stuhr Funeral Home’s planning tool. There’s no obligation or pressure. It’s a resource to help you determine budget and start working through details to give you and your loved one’s peace of mind.